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A Holiday Letter To Our Family

Bethany Hall, MSN, FNP

KEY TAKEAWAYS

Holidays, Self-Care

1. Holidays can trigger grief and overwhelm for kids with trauma.

2. Preparing the extended family reduces misunderstandings.

3. Intentional support creates safer, more connected celebrations.

This resource is part of “All is Not Calm: Supporting Your Child During the Hectic Holiday Season” Holiday Training. If you would like to learn more about this training or any of other trainings. Click Here.

Supporting Children with Trauma During the Holidays

The holidays can be especially challenging for children with trauma histories, as familiar traditions and celebrations may unexpectedly trigger stress, anxiety, or emotional meltdowns. By understanding how trauma can affect behaviors like selective eating, withdrawal, or heightened sensitivity to noise and crowds, caregivers can create a safe, supportive, and joyful holiday environment that allows children to participate with confidence and comfort.

Preparing our family members in advance with what they can expect and offering a compassionate way to explain what these behaviors might mean can go a long way towards equipping them to help create a supportive environment.

Trauma-Responsive Holidays: Preparing Extended Family for Connection and Care

This guide helps parents, caregivers, and educators prepare children and family members in advance, offering trauma-informed strategies to manage triggers, reduce overstimulation, and support emotional regulation.

Why This Matters

With some intentional preparation, the holidays can be a time of connection and healing for everyone. When families and relatives work together to meet the needs of children impacted by foster care and adoption, it provides ways for more people to support your child on their healing journey. For more information about how to support your children during the holidays read this guest blog by Dr. John DeGarmo: “Navigating Foster Care During The Holidays“

1. Pencil and printed handout

2. Open hearts and listening ears

3. A snack to fuel ideas

All is Not Calm: Support During The Holidays

ConnectionPlus is here to help your family not just survive the holiday season, but thrive in it.

Connecting with teens can feel tough. Video games, earbuds, and social media often command their attention, and one-word answers can leave caregivers wondering, What are they thinking? What are they feeling? Do they even care? Some teens keep their emotions tightly guarded, while others huff, puff, and stomp away when parents try to enter their world.

When it feels like the door is closing, shared journaling can offer another way in. This simple practicebuilds relationship without forcing conversation. It allows teens to express how they feel at their own pace, in their own words, and without the pressure of face-to-face interaction or nonverbal cues that can sometimes create barriers.

What Shared Journaling Can Look Like at Home

In one family, shared journaling became a simple weekly rhythm. A parent and their daughters took turns answering questions in a journal, leaving it on one another’s pillow each week. Over time, this small practice opened a window into the girls’ hearts—their hopes and dreams, friendships, interests, and struggles.

The journal also became a space for the children to learn more about their parent as a teen and young adult, often discovering unexpected things they had in common. What mattered most wasn’t writing something wise or perfectly worded. The connection came from open-ended prompts and a willingness to listen without correcting, fixing, or lecturing.

Trauma and Adolescence